Are you playing financial tug-a-war with your spouse? You both have your own plan on how to spend money, but you aren't getting any closer to your financial goals.
- Do you want to gain control of your finances?
- Do you want to become debt free?
- How much money do you want to save?
- What does financial independence look like in your life?
All of these questions are great to dream about and think through. Deciding what your money goals need to look like is the first step in obtaining them. You need to be intentional with and have a plan for your money.
Regardless what your financial goals are, you will not be able to reach them if you are not paying attention to your financial status by just going through life 'hoping' everything will work out. Your money situation only gets worse if you do not discover how to work together with your spouse about money.
You and your spouse need to share the same financial goals
If you don't share the same financial goals it can very difficult and at times impossible, to obtain your financial wants when your spouse has very different plans and you are at odds with each other.
When you work together on the same goal, you can motivate and encourage each other in the rough times. You have some one to celebrate with when you finally make progress and achieve your goals.
Stop treating your finances as a game of tug-a-war!
You are playing tug-a-war with your spouse when you do not share financial goals and dreams.
You will win some ground and you will lose some ground. Whoever has the strongest opinion will eventually yank the other spouse on to his/her side. The spouse will come very reluctantly and will be resentful of being yanked over. Neither of you will win.
Instead, start looking at money obstacles in your life as a heavy weight the two of you need to lift together to move out of your life, rather than blaming each other as the source of the problem. [Tweet "You are playing tug-a-war with your spouse when you do not share financial goals and dreams."]
When you are able to work together as a team on a shared goal, instantly you will have a greater focus and can encourage each other to keep going when it is hard to persevere. You will have someone with whom you can share the joys, disappointments and triumphs. Your marriage will become stronger.
Money affects every area of life and you will experience greater intimacy, deeper conversation and will become more of a unified front when you have common financial goals with your spouse. Everyone wants more of those qualities in their marriage, right?
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Taking all the time you need now to talk to your spouse about the reasons why you want to change your financial situation and how you need a plan to get there will help make the actual process so much smoother. You are laying a foundation for how you and your spouse will win with money. Do not rush through this stage.
Please do not pick up the tug-a-war rope.
The first goal is to gain common ground as a couple. One easy way to start the conversation is to ask your spouse about what s/he would like to do or go if there were no payments and if your money was under control. Today, just dream together. Say yes to your spouse's dreams and add some of your own.
After you have established shared financial goals, you can then designate specific tasks to each partner, discover a new course for reaching your goals, and start following the necessary steps to accomplish your dreams. You will need to find a new way to communicate about finances, because the old ways are not working.
As you begin to communicate and work together on finances, see if your relationship starts to improve instantly.
Today, if you want an easy win, just stop reaching for the tug-a-war rope.
Are you playing tug-a-war with your spouse? Do you share financial goals together?